pica_scribit: (Gryffindor - RL/SB - Tender)
[personal profile] pica_scribit
Some of you probably saw this posted to my journal the other day, but it just *won't leave me alone* so I've given it its own page now, and might be working ever so slightly on Chapter Two tonight. ([livejournal.com profile] _jenc_, you still okay to Scot-pick for me?)

Title: Highland Fling
Word Count: In progress...
Rating: M
Warnings: Scottish Remus, American Sirius, mention of past sexual assault and cottaging
Genre: Romance, present-day non-magic AU
Pairing: Remus/Sirius
Summary: The summer before college, Sirius goes backpacking through Scotland in order to escape his family's expectations. In a small village in the Highlands, an unexpected flirtation turns his whole world upside down.

"Auntie Fiona likes a bit o' help wi' the tourists, but honestly, I was just needin' to get away for a bit."

Sirius raised his glass in salute to the idea. "Right there with you. Do they not want you to do Geology or something?" He had warred long and hard with his own parents over his decision to minor in a "useless" subject like Art History.

"Nay, they were fine aboot the course," said Remus slowly. "It was more the other thing. Me wantin' to shag blokes. They dinna think much o' that."
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Date: 2011-11-03 12:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lady-luthienne.livejournal.com
Eeeeeee!!! R/S + romance novel + Scotland = Plllease to be continuing soon!
They're both adorable here, you write adolescent R/S very well, canon or au.

Date: 2011-11-03 01:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
This sort of combination is like crack to me. I'm starting to develop a real taste for AUs, with their much-improved odds of a happy ending for our boys.

You know, you'd think a romance novel would be pretty easy to write, but somehow I never make things simple for myself. At the moment, I am looking at maps and researching the geology of Scotland.

Date: 2011-11-03 12:48 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
This is off to a great start. Can't wait for more!

Date: 2011-11-03 01:35 pm (UTC)

Date: 2011-11-03 03:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] brighty18.livejournal.com
This is going to be awesome! Well, it is already awesome, but what I mean is that I can't wait to read more.

I love these incarnations of Remus and Sirius, and Remus' accent is just delightful. I've always been a bit nervous of writing accents, but you seem to have a knack for it.

And now I want to go to Scotland.

Date: 2011-11-03 03:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
I don't know if I could do justice to any accent besides this one. I've lived in Scotland for four years, dated two Scotsmen, and spent about ten years reading and re-reading Diana Gabaldon's Outlander novels, which do a fair job of rendering the dialect phonetically. Just writing this is making me want to go back to Scotland. It's been more than three years since the last time I visited. I miss it so!

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From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com - Date: 2011-11-04 11:38 am (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2011-11-03 10:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] luaestrela.livejournal.com
I like it! And to think that I only read it because it's yours. I mean, I'd never given a non-magical AU a chance before. How prejudicious am I? I joined LJ last month and Conspiracy of Cartographers is one my favourites up to now.

Date: 2011-11-04 11:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
It took me a long time to get into AUs, magic or otherwise. But really, it offers so much more range to play with the characters, and in the case of Remus/Sirius, a chance to give them a happy ending. Thanks for reading!

Date: 2011-11-04 01:43 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_jenc_/
I have literally just got home after an evening out with my best friend from Scotland who is visiting... To find a fair few messages in my inbox dear! I promise to have a good look over it all tomorrow but alas I am pished and needing some kip.

No doubt it'll be grand! Look forward to it. *hugs*

Date: 2011-11-04 11:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
I hope you like it! Chapter Three is about half done at this point.

(A' this writin' in Scots has caused the Corries tae get stuck in my heid.)

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Date: 2011-11-04 04:31 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] anneswonderland.livejournal.com
I love Scotland! The combination of R/S and Scotland is awesome. And now with the pictures it’s even better. I can’t wait to read more

Date: 2011-11-04 04:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
I'm loving this combination, too. More in a couple of days, probably!

Date: 2011-11-06 12:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] amuly.livejournal.com
Eeeeeee ^.^ Love this! Poor confused Sirius. I'm sure Remus will help shed some light on the solution to his dilemma... >_< Hehehe

Date: 2011-11-06 12:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
Heh. He might have an idea or two. I'm really enjoying writing a version of Remus who isn't broken. It means I can give him a greater degree of comfort with himself, his body, and his sexuality.

Date: 2011-11-06 02:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rox712.livejournal.com
Read both chapters and I really like this. And even as a non native English speaker I get what Remus says :-D

Date: 2011-11-06 02:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
Thank you, and thanks for letting me know.

Date: 2011-11-06 09:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] forest-rose.livejournal.com
Oh oh oh oh, I was not at all sure about Scottish Remus at first, but I am utterly besotted now. It's so right for him! Also, that's almost exactly how I found that I liked whiskey - in a small Edinburgh pub in my case, but the barman persevered until we found one I liked. And I, too, was squiffy afterwards :-) xxx

Date: 2011-11-07 06:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
Och, the Scottish laddies will win ye over every time! It's the accent, ye ken. It's just sae bloody charming! ;p

I'm not a fan of whiskey myself, but I did enjoy visiting a small distillery outside a lovely little village in the Highlands on my last trip three years ago. Who knew it would be difficult to describe the taste of sometime I tried once that long ago?

Date: 2011-11-07 04:51 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lady-luthienne.livejournal.com
Squee! There's more!
This is really just so lovely, with the lushness of the setting, and the interesting dynamic of meeting for the first time as adults.
Plus, geeky Scottish geologist Remus is absolutely adorable, and so is brash but shy yankee Sirius!

Date: 2011-11-07 06:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
Hee! Well, they do say one should write what one knows. Not geology so much, for me, but definitely what it's like to be a Yank in Scotland for the first time, falling in love with the gorgeousness of the place and the hot men with their sexy accents!

Date: 2011-11-09 10:44 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] amuly.livejournal.com
Eeeehehehe. Love it! Especially Sirius' repeated deceleration that he's not gay. Uh-huh. Suuure, sweetie. :P

Date: 2011-11-09 10:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
Poor Sirius, so confused! Don't worry; Remus will set him ... er ... straight? No, that doesn't sound right at all. Glad you're enjoying it.

Date: 2011-11-09 10:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] perrie.livejournal.com
I'm definitely enjoying this, and really enjoying your characterisation - the idea of Remus as a geologist is so nice, and really gels with his obvious love of academia and learning in the books. I like Sirius' wide eyed wonder at discovering Scotland, too - it's a lovely gentle roll-along of a fic.

The only thing that I am struggling with - and I say this very nicely - is Remus' speech. I understand that you want to convey him as a rural Scot, and writing dialect is steep in anyones books, especially the Fife dialect. I do applaud you with that. It's just, (personally!) as a Brit and as someone who has lived in Scotland for several years and has many Scottish friends, that I find it incredibly jarring.

I think, honestly, that just limiting his written speech patterns to dialect Scots words, and not applying it to everything he says would be far more effective. After all, I'm naturally hearing Sirius' voice in an RP English accent, not American (even though I know he is American for this universe), so to have one voice written in such a deliberate dialect, and the other to be written in standard English is just odd. Does that make sense?

Otherwise, I really do think that it's a lovely fic, and I do like your Remus and Sirius. (:
Edited Date: 2011-11-09 10:17 pm (UTC)

Date: 2011-11-10 01:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
Thanks for the feedback. I understand why some people would feel this way about Remus's dialogue, but I think I'm going to keep it as-is. I just can't seem to get the proper rhythm to his words without it, and I've had a couple of Scots respond positively to it (including my Scot-picker, [livejournal.com profile] _jenc_). I hope you'll continue to read and enjoy the story anyway, and that it won't be *too* jarring.

Date: 2011-11-09 11:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lady-luthienne.livejournal.com
Getting there indeed! Mmm...
This chapter conveys such a depth of longing, frustration, wonderment and anxiety all swirled up together!

Tsk, Sirius, denial is bad for your health.

Date: 2011-11-10 01:51 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
Thanks again! Poor Sirius! I'm sure he'll sort himself out eventually.

Date: 2011-11-10 01:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] starlite-gone.livejournal.com
I'm enjoying this! I finally got the chance to read it. I really liked the Den and the feel of that scene in the latest chapter. I liked it even more because I was Wiccan for several years and even now feel vaguely Paganlike in my belief system, and that place seemed like exactly the sort of place I would be proud to count as anything related to my religion, if that makes sense.

Also, the comment about "oh it's not old, only a few centuries" "uh that's still old" was so cute because that right there is a great example of the way age changes in context. It reminds me of Eddie Izzard making fun of Americans about restoring old buildings, particularly because it's so true XD



Anyway, I think it's kind of sad (in a good way) the way Sirius thought he could basically have a fling with Remus and be done with it, and he wasn't really taking into account Remus' feelings in it, and then Remus decided it was fine so long as he went into it expecting that-- it's just kind of sad that they're both basically okay with Remus being used like that. And I don't say that in any way as anything bad about the story because I think it makes complete sense that they're both thinking that-- I just figure they may find by the end of it that it's a bit harder to have a no-strings-attached, completely forgettable fling after all. Or at least the romantic in me likes to think that way so they end up together for good ^_~

I'll look forward to the next release!

Oh right, also-- are those pictures you took when you were in Scotland? Man I want to go to Scotland so bad...

Date: 2011-11-10 02:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
Aww! Thank you for the long and thoughtful comment! Personally, I sort of toe the line between Episcopalian and pagan (sometimes refer to myself as Episcopagan), so I really appreciate the natural magic/spirituality of places like the Den. The Den and all the places mentioned in the story are real, and I've been to them (and yes, those pictures come from my travels around Scotland), though they are not necessarily exactly as I describe them, and some of them are in different locations.

LOVE Eddie Izzard. Saw him live once years ago. He's marvelous. There's also an expression I've heard many a time: "A Brit thinks 100 miles is a long way, and an American thinks 100 years is a long time." It's all a matter of scale.

And yeah, the boys are being sort of stupid about the whole thing in their own unique, naive ways, but teenage romance is such a messy business. I'm sure they'll get their heads screwed on straight sooner or later.

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Date: 2011-11-13 01:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] amuly.livejournal.com

Oooohhh Sirius. Enjoying all your carnal relations with Remus. :DDDD

Love this. Hot and sweet and honestly, everything is so adorably perfect right now that I'm a bit nervous as to where this is going... D:

Date: 2011-11-13 02:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
Hee! Glad you're enjoying it. It's a romance novel, so it will go where those tend to go. ;p

Date: 2011-11-13 06:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rox712.livejournal.com
Oh my ... THAT was hot and sweet and i really like this version of the guys. And Sirius coming to terms with his sexuality seems right.

Date: 2011-11-13 10:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
Thank you! I'm really digging writing them like this as well.

Date: 2011-11-14 02:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lady-luthienne.livejournal.com
Well, that was quite exceptionally hot, and sweet besides. I love Sirius' conflicting eagerness and anxiety, and Remus' patient tenderness. And now I'm left with a mix of happy contentment and no small amount of worry about the morning after to come, much like the boys, I guess. Masterful writing!

Date: 2011-11-14 02:31 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
*grin* I guess we'll just have to wait and see....

Date: 2011-11-17 02:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lady-luthienne.livejournal.com
Oh, so aching sweet. Sirius is a darling. Although he was the hesitant one at the beginning, it's clear that, as is his nature, he has thrown his whole heart into their powerful but painfully brief relationship. I only wonder what suddenly reserved Remus is thinking and feeling that he isn't letting himself show.

Date: 2011-11-17 04:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
I'm actually kind of relieved to hear people say they liked this chapter. I was seriously worried about how disjointed it felt while I was writing it.

Yeah, Remus has some stuff he needs to think about, too. We'll hear about that in a couple of chapters.

Date: 2011-11-17 03:31 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] amuly.livejournal.com
Ooooo. I can't wait for them to meet up again. I love Sirius' reaction in this: relatively calm and accepting. He's like, okay, not something I thought of before, but yeah, no use denying it. :DDDD

Date: 2011-11-17 04:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
Well, the good thing about Sirius is that, if you're not James or Remus, he doesn't really give a shit what you think, and he'll do whatever he thinks is best. He's not quite sure he's ready to apply terms like "gay" or "queer" to himself, but he's definitely to the point where he can't deny that "straight" might not be the most accurate label.

Date: 2011-11-18 02:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lizzy0308.livejournal.com
Gah !! I lost track of this on ff before I could review I think. !! Have I mentioned this is AWESOME!! I am so in love with this story. Your plot is magical and your characters are fantastic. I'm so enjoying reading this. Can't wait to see how Sirius comes back to Remus. He does come back to Remus... Right?! You're doing a great job writing in my opinion. It's so rich and lovely. Please post soon

Date: 2011-11-18 03:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
Glad you found me! I'm so happy that so many people are enjoying this story. And it's a romance novel, so that should tell you something about the outcome for R/S. ;p

Date: 2011-11-19 02:29 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] littledreamowl.livejournal.com
I really like this story. Usually I'm not too into the whole AU stories but this is great! I hope Sirius turns back and goes to Remus!

Date: 2011-11-19 07:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
Thank you! AUs are fun to play with, because it's the only way I get to give my OTP a happy ending. Which, yes, will be happening in this case. It might just take them a while to get there.

Date: 2011-11-23 06:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] brighty18.livejournal.com
I really need to catch up on this story.

This chapter was wonderful, and truly made me feel as if I were in Scotland. It also made me realize how much I miss precipitation. Rain, mist, and everything in between can be so lovely.

The characters are developing nicely, too. I very much liked your explanation about Sirius and his "girlfriend." That felt very real and very right - and also very canon appropriate. He's exploring now, finding himself and discovering truths. Granted, that seems to be what one does at his age, but the fact that he's been so sheltered makes it all the more real and poignant.

And this was beautiful description of whiskey: "Just the American stuff," said Sirius with a shrug as the woman behind the bar poured out tulip-shaped glasses of aromatic gold.

Date: 2011-11-23 09:29 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
Yay! I got brighty-loved. That always makes my day. You can have some of our rain if you want. It's been bucketing down here for a couple o days. We are getting no internet at the house. Glad you like this.It would probably have been my entry for this year's Games.

Date: 2011-11-23 07:04 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] brighty18.livejournal.com
At last, Remus breathed a long sigh. "That wasna sae bad, was it?"

A soft, helpless groan emerged from somewhere in the vicinity of his shoulder. "Think we desecrated your holy place."

"Nay." Remus opened his eyes and smiled up into the branches of the prayer tree. "I think maybe this is just the sort o' thing this place was meant for."

That was lovely! Truly lovely, in all senses.

In fact, this whole chapter was truly lovely. (Well, and hot. It DID include one of my favorite kinks, after all.) Siriusly, though, I loved the tree and the Den and the very fact that Remus was willing to show the place to Sirius. That says a lot.

Date: 2011-11-23 09:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
*grin* I remember that's one of the things you like. Dirty lass! If you can't tell from the photos, all the locations I've used are real places, more or less exactly as described, though I've rearranged the geography in places.

Date: 2011-11-23 07:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] brighty18.livejournal.com
Okay, that was like the best sex chapter EVER! Not long after that, Remus fell asleep, one arm still cradling Sirius against his chest. But Sirius lay awake for a while, staring out the window as the moon rose in the clear night sky.

I had sex with a man, he thought, testing himself to see how he felt about it. Really incredible sex. I lost my virginity to Remus Lupin. His mind was quiet. There was no regret or disgust for what they had done. He felt only a quiet contentment. After a while, he slept.

I don't know why, but nothing gets me like virgin!Sirius - especially the way you write him. There is something quite glorious about his shy, intense hesitancy. Sirius feels so much. He enjoys pleasure and really wants to please. You capture that aspect of him exceedingly well. And when it's his first time? For some reason that is even better to me. I think it's because you understand that, on some level, Sirius wants to explore everything. That includes sex, but only works sexually if he feels safe and loved. That become shiningly clear in this chapter.


Date: 2011-11-25 07:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
*grin* Apparently I am hitting all your buttons with this one. Excellent! I means I don't have to feel like I am being completely self-indulgent. I was really pleased with the way this chapter turned out, too. I hope I can keep up the momentum through the rest of it. It's looking like maybe ten chapters total at this point.

I see Sirius's nature as being very canine. He has an fierce loyalty streak, and he craves affection and approval above all else. He just desperately needs to be loved, and his family doesn't really give him that.

Date: 2011-11-23 08:24 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] brighty18.livejournal.com
This was made of win on many levels, not the least of which is camping!Sirius and contemplative!Sirius.

I'm a big believer in Sirius being outdoorsy and loving camping. This is to the point that in my HiH app when I was asked which character I'd take into the Forbidden Forest with me, I answered "Sirius Black." Hell, even in canon he roughed it for a long time. I also just see him as liking being outside and your description of the Scotish countryside made it even better.

But contemplative!Sirius? That was REALLY made of win. I love his thoughts on his family back home and his thoughts about Remus: Confusion muted the fierce joy he had felt at the independence of being alone in a strange country during the first several days of his travels, and with confusion came a certain amount of loneliness. He wished James were with him. It would have been good to talk things over with his best friend. James Potter had a practical, humorous way of looking at the world that would have been a great comfort under the circumstances. Sirius wasn't sure how James would take the news that his friend was maybe not quite as straight as he had always assumed, but he hoped it wouldn't create any awkwardness in their friendship. He couldn't imagine not telling his best friend what had happened.

Now he just needs to make the right decision!

Date: 2011-11-25 07:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pica-scribit.livejournal.com
If Sirius wasn't outdoorsy to start with, I think canon made him that way in the end. After 12 years in Azkaban, it's a wonder he ever wanted to good indoors again. But I think that, since some of his happiest memories from his youth involved running around during full moons with Remus, he would always be fond of that sort of thing.

But in the Forbidden Forest? I'd take Remus with me. At least, my version of Remus with his awesome wolf senses and instinctive Defence skills.

Oog. Our modem died at home, and the signal here at work is pretty weak. Very little internet for me the past few days. Fixed soon, I hope.
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