pica_scribit: (Gryffindor - RL/SB - Tender)
Title: TransLate
Author: [personal profile] pica_scribit (complete fic archive)
Word Count: ~5000
Genre: AU, romance, drama, angst, hurt/comfort
Rating: M
Warnings: Deals frankly with a trans male character experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and abortion.
Characters: Remus Lupin, Sirius Black, Poppy Pomfrey
Pairing: Remus/Sirius
Summary: The Easter before their NEWTs, Remus and Sirius receive some shocking news.
Disclaimer: Harry Potter characters and the Wizarding world are the sole property of J. K. Rowling. I own nothing except my own ideas, and make no profit. No copyright infringement is intended.
Note: This is a sequel to my first trans!Remus story, TransFigured.

Remus gave a hollow, humourless chuckle.

"Is something funny?" his boyfriend asked irritably.

"A bit," said Remus. "Pomfrey thinks I'm pregnant."

Sirius stilled. "That's not funny."

"No, I suppose it's not."

"Are you?"

Remus looked down at his feet, dangling over the lake. "Yeah."
pica_scribit: (Grindelwald Won)
Edited to make Kingsley trans, since that's my new headcanon for him.

Title: One Hell of a Woman
Word Count: 3100
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Relationships: Kingsley Shacklebolt/Helga Hufflepuff
Characters: Kingsley Shacklebolt, Quirinus Quirrell, Helga Hufflepuff, Statue Helga Hufflepuff, Original Male Character(s)
Additional Tags: Fluff, Humor, Canon Compliant, Black Male Character, Bisexual Male Character, Trans Male Character, Kingsley is bi and trans, Sexual Fantasy, Dream Sex, Frottage, Statues, Snarky Gargoyles, Hogwarts, Rare Characters, Rare Pairings, Trans Female Character, Podfic, Podfic Available, Podfic Length: 10-20 Minutes
Summary: In his final year at Hogwarts, Kingsley develops a fascination with his House's founder, leading to a strange encounter in the Hogwarts staffroom.

Bent over a thick book in the Hogwarts library, Kingsley found himself drawn into the world of the school's founders. Every now and then, he would encounter some fact or detail which might be useful for his project, and made note of it, but more often than not, he found himself sidetracked by anecdotes of Helga Hufflepuff's tolerance, good humour, and many rumoured love affairs.

She had been a woman ahead of her time. Not only was she the first of the founders to accept Muggleborn students without reservation; she had never discriminated on the grounds of race nor gender nor sexual orientation. Kingsley himself was a pure-blood wizard, but as a black, queer trans man, Hufflepuff's reputation for progressiveness was extremely relevant to his interests. It was said that Hufflepuff herself had never turned anyone away from her bed, regardless of gender, if they pleased her eye.
pica_scribit: (Gryffindor - RL/SB - Tender)
I've now edited this fic, adding ~900 words to the smutty part, and recorded a podfic of the new version.

Title: Just Sex
Word Count: 6100
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin, mentioned James Potter/Lily Evans Potter
Characters: Remus Lupin, Sirius Black, James Potter
Additional Tags: Friendship, Romance, Getting Together, Shameless Smut, First War with Voldemort, top!Remus, Bottom!Sirius, One Night Stands, Friends to Lovers, Anal Sex, Secretly In Love With Each Other For Years, Coming Out, Podfic, Podfic Available, Podfic Length: 30-45 Minutes, Canon Compliant, Explicit Consent


Remus looked away. The truth was that he did want to bed Sirius. The knowledge that Sirius was willing and eager to have him made his palms sweat and his heart race. That did not make it a good idea. "I don't want to be one of your conquests, Padfoot. And I don't want to lose you as a friend."

Sirius's voice softened. "You wouldn't, Moony. That would never happen."

"You don't know that."

Sirius touched his arm, forcing Remus to meet his eyes. "You've been one of my best mates for eight years, Moony," he said gently. "We've been through so much together. We care about each other. Nothing's going to wreck that. It's just sex. It doesn't have to change anything."

Just sex. It was easy for Sirius to say that. But it would never be "just sex" for Remus. Not with Sirius.
pica_scribit: (Gryffindor - RL/SB - Marauder's Map)
Title: On the Cusp of Slytherin
Word Count: 6600
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Minerva McGonagall/Tom Riddle
Characters: Minerva McGonagall, Tom Riddle | Voldemort, Albus Dumbledore, Moaning Myrtle, Galatea Merrythought, Armando Dippet, Original Female Character(s)
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Teen Pregnancy, Chamber of Secrets, Accidental Incest, Secret Identity, Pureblood Culture, POV First Person, Unplanned Pregnancy, Emotional Manipulation, Riddle at Hogwarts Era, Minor Violence, Podfic, Podfic Available, Podfic Length: 30-45 Minutes
Summary: 1942-43: A Gryffindor girl learns the hard way why Slytherin boys are best left alone, especially if that boy is named Tom Riddle. Edited July 2014.

This fic grew out of a pre-Deathly Hallows fan theory that McGonagall would turn out to be a secret villain (balancing Snape's secret hero), based on circumstantial evidence found mainly in Chamber of Secrets, and the birthdate originally given for her which would have made her a year older than Tom Riddle.

If you were to ask someone from each of the Hogwarts Houses what it means to be a Gryffindor, you would probably come up with four different answers. Gryffindors themselves will harp on proudly about bravery in the face of terrible odds, and great feats of heroism. Ravenclaws, on the other hand, will point to their history books and happily tell you about dozens of historical Gryffindors who were anything but heroic. A more naturally-cautious Hufflepuff might tell you that Gryffindors have a tendency to dive into dangerous situations without thinking, or stick their noses into things that do not concern them. And Slytherins? Everyone knows what they think: that Gryffindors are all hot air and arrogance, and that a person usually has to die to be proclaimed a hero.

Which do I think is right? They all are, to some extent. Some Gryffindors are more one thing than the other, and for some of us, it depends upon the day of the week, or which way the wind is blowing. One thing upon which all the Houses can usually agree is that, if a person is doing something for shock value, nine times out of ten, that person is a Gryffindor.
pica_scribit: (Gryffindor - RL/SB - Marauder's Map)
Oops. My hand slipped.

Title: A Night Off From the War
Rating: Explicit
Relationships: James/Lily, Remus/Sirius, James/Lily/Remus/Sirius,
Characters: Lily, James, Remus, Sirius
Additional Tags: First War with Voldemort, Canon Compliant, Recreational Drug Use, Group Sex, Bi-Curiosity, First Time, Fellatio, Anal Fingering, Rimming, Anal Sex, Masturbation, Vaginal Sex, Friends With Benefits, Voyeurism, Explicit Consent, Friendship, Pregnant Sex
Summary: The war rages on. Lily and her friends need a break, and James has always been a little curious.... (June 1980)

Sirius sniffed his goblet. "Should you be experimenting with potions in your condition?"

"It's safe," she assured him. "I double-checked all the ingredients. I brewed it a little strong. This dose should give us a pleasant evening."

"I've heard this stuff can have ... interesting side effects," said Remus.

Lily could not hide a smile. "It can. But we're among friends here."

Sirius frowned suspiciously. "What side effects?"

"Euphoria elixir has a reputation for lowering inhibitions," Remus told him.

Sirius's eyebrows rose. "And we haven't tried it before now, why exactly?"
pica_scribit: Pica Pica (Default)
Behold, I have written Hagrid fic. Hagrid does not get enough love in the fandom or in the fanfic, and the love he does get tends to be gross fetishisation around his enormous dong. This story explores how Hagrid feels about this kind of dehumanising objectification, as he reflects on his troubled sexual and romantic history. Also covered are the importance of consent and proper lubrication.

This story was co-inspired with alchemypotato's Hagrid's Big Problem. Some ideas are shared in common, and some are entirely my own.

NB: My Hagrid is bisexual and gender fluid.

Warnings: underage sexual coercion, human/centaur sexual relationship.

Please let me know if I have inadvertently done anything problematic, and I will fix it ASAP.

Dumbledore sighed. "You're a good lad, Rubeus, and I am a busy and forgetful man, not the attentive guardian a young man such as yourself needs. I have been remiss in your education. There is one very important lesson that every young person should learn. I am late in imparting it to you, and for that, I am truly sorry and humbly beg your forgiveness. The lesson is this: if you do not want to touch another person, or you do not want another person to touch you, you can always, always say no. No matter what the circumstances, you never forfeit that right. Your body belongs to you, and you alone. Do you understand, Rubeus?"

Hagrid had looked down at his hands, knotted together in his lap. "I jus' wanted them ter like me."

(Sorry I have been MIA lately. I had a couple of very busy months. I am champing at the fic-writing bit and will be back at it in April.)
pica_scribit: (Grindelwald Won)
For my birthday, I commissioned the glorious Mark of Mark Read and Mark Watches fame to read my shory, fluffy story, The Dursleys' Worst Nightmare. And he liked it! Woo!

pica_scribit: Pica Pica (Gryffindor - RL/SB - Hermione)
Title: Against the Wall
Word Count: ~1900
Rating: M
Warnings: Forced voyeurism
Genre: Smut, slash, mostly PWP
Pairing: Remus/Sirius
Summary: Sirius is irritable from his continued house arrest at Grimmauld Place, and Remus is tired of the way the Wizarding world looks down on him. They exact a little sweet revenge. Wall!sex with Walburga Black's portrait as an unwilling witness.
Notes: I blame all the filthy pervs at [livejournal.com profile] hp_adult for inspiring this one. I don't normally even write Second War fic.
pica_scribit: (Gryffindor - RL/SB - Tender)
Title: Just Sex
Word Count: ~5300
Rating: M
Genre: Smut, Romance, Fluff
Pairing(s): Remus/Sirius
Synopsis: Remus and Sirius find out that sex complicates things. But not always in a bad way. (Dec 1979)
Author's Note: Not part of my usual head-canon.
Disclaimer: Harry Potter characters and the Wizarding world are the sole property of J. K. Rowling. I own nothing except my own ideas, and make no profit. No copyright infringement is intended.
pica_scribit: (Gryffindor - RL/SB - Tender)
(Formerly a Very Secret Post on my Very Secret Filter)

Title: Take This Longing
Author: [livejournal.com profile] pica_scribit
Word Count: 9204
Genre: Drama, Angst, Smut
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Explicit sex, strong language, dirty talk, jealousy, suspected infidelity, violent images, no happy ending because canon is a cruel mistress.
Timeline: April 1981
Characters: Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, James Potter, Peter Pettigrew, Harry Potter, Unnamed Flirtatious Muggle (OC), Albus Dumbledore, Alexandre d'Argenson (OC), Amabilis (OC)
Pairing(s): Remus/Sirius, hints of Remus/OMC and Sirius/OMC
Synopsis: If Remus doesn't need him anymore, then what's the point of anything?
Disclaimer: Harry Potter characters and the Wizarding world are the sole property of J. K. Rowling. I own nothing except my own ideas, and make no profit. No copyright infringement is intended. Please don't sue me. Take This Longing lyrics are the property of Leonard Cohen.
Author's Note: Written for the [livejournal.com profile] rs_games 2010. This was a bit of a change for me. I don't usually do first person narrative, but Sirius wanted to tell you this story in his own words. For someone who hates confrontation almost as much as Remus does, I find it surprisingly easy to write snarky, angry dialogue. Lord, how I've missed writing porn!

It seems like everything is moving away from me these days. Father and Regulus are dead. We hardly ever see Andromeda and her family anymore. Peter's too busy looking after his sick mother to keep in touch. There's still James, obviously, but he's got Lily and Harry to think of now. Even the Aurors decided they didn't want me, because apparently loving you and working in law enforcement was a "conflict of interests".

I could live with all that. Sure, I'd growl and rage and shake my fist at the sky, but so long as I still had you, I could grit my teeth and get through anything the world threw at us. But if I'm losing you, too, then what have I got left, Moony? What's the point of me? Of everything I've ever done? What is there left to fight for?

Title: Menage a Trois
Author: [livejournal.com profile] pica_scribit
Word Count: 6262
Genre: Smutty, smutty smut. Also? Smut. Not quite PWP, but almost, with a helping of hurt/comfort tacked on at the end.
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Aside from it being a M/M/M threesome involving an OC? Nothing too kinky. Some French pillowtalk.
Timeline: 10 March 1981
Characters: Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, Alexandre d'Argenson (OC)
Pairing(s): Remus/Sirius, Remus/Sirius/OMC
Synopsis: Remus wants something a bit different for his 21st birthday, and of course Sirius can refuse him nothing. This is what might have happened if Alexandre had had a couple more days to get to know Remus and Sirius before he and Remus went on their disasterous French mission.
Disclaimer: Harry Potter characters and the Wizarding world are the sole property of J. K. Rowling. I own nothing except my own ideas, and make no profit. No copyright infringement is intended. Please don't sue me.
Author's Note: This was written largely for my own perverted amusement, and does not fit with my personal canon of Remus/Sirius's continuity, but after what I did to poor Alexandre in my [livejournal.com profile] rs_games fic, I couldn't very well refuse him when he asked for this.

"Are you jealous, Padfoot?" The bastard sounded amused.

"No," Sirius said too quickly. "Why? Should I be?"

A little huffing laugh tickled his ear. "He's not planning to steal me from you, if that's what you're worried about. If you hadn't been so busy noticing him noticing me, you might've noticed him noticing you, too. Not that I could blame him."

That gave Sirius pause. "He was?"

"Mm-hmm. He wants both of us. Together."
pica_scribit: (Gryffindor - RL/SB - Tender)
Title: Painting Music
Fandom: Boy Meets Boy by David Levithan.
Word Count: ~3000
Rating: M
Genre: Fluff, Romance, Slash
Pairing(s): Paul/Noah
Synopsis: PWP in Noah's studio, just in time for Paul's 16th birthday.
Author's Note: Oh my God! It's not Potterfic! What is the world coming to? What has this book done to my braaaaaaaaain?!

"What is it?"

His eyes turn away from the painting and find mine. "It's what it feels like, kissing you," he says quietly. His eyes are very green, and his expression is unfathomable. "But I can't get it quite right. Help me?"

Entranced by his eyes, I slowly raise my hand to wrap around his, holding the brush, and I lean in to kiss him.

Suddenly, my back is against the wall, and Noah's mouth is on mine, bruising. My hands clutch at the fabric of his shirt, and his slide up under mine, feeling the bare skin of my back. Noah's whole body is pressed to mine, like he's dying and I've got what he needs to survive. I feel dizzy, like we're at the center of the rotation of the universe, and everything is spinning but us.
pica_scribit: Pica Pica (Gryffindor - Trio - Growing up)
Title: The Dursleys' Worst Nightmare
Wordcount: ~2700
Rating: K+
Genre: Fluff, friendship, romance
Characters: Dudley Dursley, Cho Chang, Harry Potter, Ginny Weasley, Percy Weasley, Romilda Vane, Rubeus Hagrid
Summary: At Harry and Ginny's wedding, Dudley discovers that every girl in the Wizarding world wants to meet famous Harry Potter's cousin.
Author's Notes: I love writing odd pairings, and after Deathly Hallows, I really wanted to see Dudley continue to grow as a person.
pica_scribit: Pica Pica (Comm - hp_adult - Plot Bunny Hat)
This is where I post links to my responses to the monthly challenges issued on [livejournal.com profile] hp_adult. All fics are rated R or NC-17.

September - One Hell of a Woman, Kingsley/Helga, Hogwarts Staff Room
October - Thrall, Ron/Lorcan d'Eath/Molly, Azkaban, Flying Motorcycle
pica_scribit: Pica Pica (Slytherin - RB/SS - So HAWT!)
Title: That Awful Boy
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 6005 (oneshot)
Genre: Drama, Romance, Teen, Het, Smut
Warnings: Underage sex, mind-altering drugs potions
Characters: Severus, Lily, Harlow "Harry" Evans, Rose Evans, Petunia
Pairing(s): Severus/Lily
Synopsis: In the summer before their seventh year, Lily and Severus attempt to renew their friendship with mixed results.
Timeline: August 1977
Disclaimer: I am not J. K. Rowling. I own nothing. Please don't sue me.
Author's Note: This story is dedicated to anyone who remembers what it was like to be seventeen.
pica_scribit: Pica Pica (Gryffindor - Trio - Growing up)
Title: Linked
Rating: K+
Word Count: ~1700
Genre: Drama, Light Slash
Pairing: Harry/Neville
Synopsis: In the days following the Battle of the Department of Mysteries, Harry can't sleep. He decides to talk to the one person who might understand.
Note: I don't write trio-generation fic very often, and I never write trio-generation slash. But I've been rereading OotP, and this tiny, fluffy bunny would not leave me alone tonight. Why is there no Harry/Neville comm on LJ?

Ever since that horrible night the previous week, and the dawn revelations in Dumbledore's office, Harry had been very aware of Neville. Watching his movements, listening to his words, noticing quirks of his personality he had never seen before. Neville, who might so easily have had Harry's life, had it not been for some unfathomable notion of Voldemort's that Harry posed the greater threat.
pica_scribit: Pica Pica (Gryffindor - McGonagall is Evil!)
Title: Gryffindor on the Cusp of Slytherin
Rating: PG-13
Status: Complete (~6900 words)
Genre: Drama, AU
Characters: Lina McLaggen, Tom Riddle, Walburga Black, unnamed elderly witch (OC), Jovis McLaggen (OC), Albus Dumbledore, Myrtle Jorkins, Armando Dippet, Galatea Merrythought, Claudia Zeller (OC), Miss Bones (OC)
Pairings: Tom/Lina
Timeline: 1942-1943
Summary: A Gryffindor girl learns why Slytherin boys are better left alone.
A/N: If you think Lina is an OC, think again. This story serves in part to demonstrate my theory that a certain well-known Potterverse character is not all she seems. Also, it was a hell of a lot of fun to write.
pica_scribit: Pica Pica (Default)
Title: The Great Unknown (Post-OotP)
Rating: PG
for language
Status: Complete (~1600 words)
Genre: AU/Crossover (Harry Potter and A Series of Unfortunate Events)
Pairings: Remus/Sirius (HP), Quigley/Violet (ASOUE)
Characters: Sirius Black (HP), Quigley Quagmire (ASOUE), Hieronymus the bar tender (AOBM), Remus Lupin (HP)
Summary: Life on the other side of the Veil isn't much of a life at all. It's a good thing there are other people there.

Note: It is not necessary to be familiar with ASOUE to read and (I hope) enjoy this fic.
pica_scribit: Pica Pica (Slytherin - SS - The Plot Bunny)
Title: The Plot Bunny (Spring 1976)
Rating: PG-13 for masturbation (brief)
Status: Complete (1229 words)
Genre: Crack!Fic
Characters: Severus Snape, Lockhart, Regulus, Dumbledore, McGonagall, Maggie Lewis (OC) and friends, Remus, Sirius, James, Peter
Pairings: Severus/Regulus (if you squint), Lockhart/Lockhart, James/Lily (implied), Remus/Sirius (implied)
Summary: In which we learn why Snape decided to give the world of Animagi a miss. (Marauders' 6th year)
pica_scribit: Pica Pica (Slytherin - RB/SS - EftDoRB)
Title: Excerpts From the Diary of Regulus Black (June 1971 - October 1979) (text-only version)
Rating: R for language, character death, underage sex and dubious consent
Status: Complete (~1500 words)
Genre: Angst, Slash, Multimedia (paper, pen, marker, water, chocolate, photoshop)
Characters: Regulus, Sirius, Orion & Walburga Black, Severus Snape
Pairing: Regulus/Severus, Remus/Sirius (mentioned)
Summary: Sixteen significant entries from Regulus's diary dating between 1971 and 1979 (dates corrected in text version to bring them in line with canon). His thoughts about his brother, his family, his love life and his intense desire to have someone be proud of him.

Title: Fuck Toy (April 1977 - October 1979)
Rating: NC-17 for language, non-con, underage sex, violence and character death
Status: Complete (~4500 words)
Genre: Angst, Slash, Drama, AU
Characters: Severus Snape, Regulus Black, Gilderoy Lockhart, Voldemort, Bellatrix Lestrange, Kreacher, Albus Dumbledore
Pairing: Regulus/Severus (Severus/Lily, Severus/Lockhart, Lockhart/Slughorn mentioned)
Summary: Sequel to Excerpts From the Diary of Regulus Black (with dates adjusted to fit official timeline). Snape's relationship with Regulus Black, why he changed sides and why Dumbledore is reluctant to share the reason publicly. DH didn't tell the whole story.

Title: Son and Heir (5 June 1980)
Rating: R for language and violence
Status: Complete (~1300 words)
Genre: Drama
Characters: Narcissa Malfoy, Lucius Malfoy, Draco Malfoy, midwife, unnamed baby
Pairings: Narcissa/Lucius
Summary: The less-than-joyful circumstances of Draco's birth.

Title: Paper Thin Hotel (Early 1996)
Rating: NC-17 for language, explicit sex and prostitution
Status: Complete (~2000 words)
Genre: Angst, Slash
Characters: Severus, Remus, Sirius, a Madam (OC), an unnamed prostitute (OC)
Pairing: Regulus/Severus (Remus/Sirius mentioned)
Summary: Sometimes life without Regulus is more than Severus can stand. Follows Fuck Toy.

August 2017



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